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I will hold you in my heart until i can hold you in my arms.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Say goodbye to my heart tonight

6691.) I thought I had forgotten about you, but you just broke my heart again. Here we go again, you did it again.

6683.) I wish you could see the potential of you and me.


6681.) Even though I tell myself everyday that I’ll finally ask you, the truth is I won’t ever work up the nerve to ask you how you feel about me again. Because as long as I don’t ask, it doesn’t entirely matter. But if I put it out there, tell you how much I care about you and ask WHY you haven’t done anything about it when everyone we know is asking the same thing… you can say no. You can say you don’t care, you don’t like me, and you can shatter my illusion. And I can’t do that to myself.

6791.) Even though you hurt me in the worst possible way, even though you can be a right cunt at some times, I still want to run away with you and live in a little cottage with you; just us. I’ll never stop loving you. You’re all I want.

6767.) You can use me, abuse me, call me names, spread shit about me, push me around and knock me down. But I will never lower myself to your level. Ever. When I don’t fight back, it’s not because I’m weak, it’s because I’m stronger than you will ever be. I’ll survive, with my pride, integrity and the knowledge that I am the best person I can be. I won’t hurt you to justify my own pain. I’m better than that. So when you’re older, more mature and ridden with sadness and guilt, just know that I’ll be happy, because I know that seeing me smile pisses you off more than anything. Karma is a beautiful thing.

On another note, a friend of mine just texted me and it hit me how much i wished i still had school. I miss school and the familiar faces i see everytime i walked down the hallway. I miss 4e3's lively atmosphere and the friendly ambience of our class. I miss being able to wear the green uniform. I miss everything and shits laaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i hate this feeling. Anyway, on a happier note will be meeting him later at 3pm. That ought to put my mind off sad things, for a while i guess.